Friday, March 7, 2014

date night


The other night we got a sitter and went out on a date, just the two of us!  We enjoyed great conversation over coffee, dinner, and even stopped for dessert on the way home.  It was a wonderful evening together right in the middle of a crazy week.  We are both thankful for these moments together and soak up every minute we get to be "just the two of us" again.

Long before we had Caleb, we recognized that our relationship needs regular dates.  For us this has meant about once a month leaving the house and doing something together, usually spending a few hours enjoying a cup of tea/coffee at a local coffee shop just talking.  We recognized that our conversation during this time was much more rejuvenating than our day to day dinner conversation.  By leaving the house, we were able to remove ourselves from the distractions of daily chores and the countless projects on our fixer upper.  Last year, when we set a monthly budget for the first time in our married life, we built in a date night each month, it's just that important to us!

When Caleb arrived all that changed.  Over the past 8 months, it's been hard to find time for just the two of us.  Between naps and feedings (Caleb's exclusively breastfed), and continuing to move forward on our house and etsy shop, it feels like we're passing Caleb back and forth trying to shovel a few bites of dinner in our mouth before moving onto the next task.  When we had time together, it felt foreign.  I can remember the first night Caleb went to bed around 7:30, leaving us with nearly 2 hours of time together, we just sat on the couch and marveled at how unfamiliar and awkward that felt.  Caleb had become an extention of us, a crutch of sorts that we couldn't be without! It was in that moment that we realized that we had been telling ourselves that we didn't need time together because he needed us, but in reality we didn't remember how to be us without him!  It reminded me that before I was a mama, I was a wife and if I was going to continue to be a good mama, I needed to continue to be a good wife!

Our first real date was on our anniversary, when Caleb was early 5 months old.  We spent the entire day away from our boy and it was hard!  I cried as we drove away, and was distracted much of the day wondering how our baby was.  But I made it and hours later as we pulled in the driveway I was overcome with excitement to see my little guy!

Since then we've had a handful of nights out and each one reminds us that before there was Caleb, there was us. And we kind of liked us!  We're a team and this journey in parenthood requires an incredible amount of teamwork.  It's important that we continue to nurture our relationship with one another so that we can be a great team!

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